We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
