Don't you send me to vm
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
