Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
