my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.