Porn is love you can see.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
