I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize