So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
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