Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a sexual gate keeper
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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