Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
