stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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