i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
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if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
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My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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