Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize