so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize