I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
