Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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