You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
