We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
