is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
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That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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