All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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