I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
