my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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