yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
she woke up with a sticky ear
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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