Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
