Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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