Sry I called you an 8
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
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