So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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