mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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