Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
