I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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