The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone