just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
