my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize