Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
