Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
