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"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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