Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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