There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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