ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
