Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
