Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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