as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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