i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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