let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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