just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
this just has baby written all over it
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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