She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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