Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
