was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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