dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
