I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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