Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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