the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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