I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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